I love flowers and I love my woman, and sometimes when those two emotions collide I have been known to buy a bouquet for the Snapper. It doesn’t have to be for any other reason than those of love outlined above, but I have noticed over the years that when I spend a little more than the minimum, the person selling the flowers might well hiss and tut and say something along the lines of
“Oh tush tush, been a very bad boy, have we?”
Being generally and daily bemused by the world as a way of life, I’ve never really given this attitude too much thought. Surely men don’t only buy flowers for women as a way of saying ‘sorry’, do they?
Any doubts I might have had about my gender’s behaviour patterns were sadly set in concrete last weekend, when I heard what happened to an excellent friend of mine.
He happens to be a responsible lover as well as a hopeless romantic, so he was buying a precautionary ‘Pack of 3’, before heading off to visit his girlfriend. Approaching the counter, he asked the male shopkeeper if they sold flowers, by any chance?
The auld fella lifted his head, looked at my friend quizzically and raised an eyebrow.
“Sure, what do you need flowers for if you’re buying condoms?”
Ah, the poetry, the joy.
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